Tuesday, January 06, 2009
school+me= RUN AWAY
being in college is very difficult for me. i realized though it's not the content of the classes that makes school difficult for me. the hardest part of school is staying in it. there's something inherent about the nature of institutionalized education that makes every cell in my body want to turn and run the opposite direction. i love learning and left to my own devices i will gobble up books and information faster than you can say cookie monster, but as soon as you put me into a "learning institution" i shut down. i need to get over it because i've been trying to stay in school for several years and i still have several years left until i am finished. it's a common theme in my life though. as soon as i am in a situation where i'm required to do what i'm doing i lose all interest and it becomes the most difficult thing in my life. when i hear people graduate from college i always wonder to myself.....they did it why can't i. school and i are like oil and vinegar.
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5 comments:
I can understand what you are saying. I would say it was a "generational rebellion" that manifests in similar ways with your mother and even one of your brothers. When I am "required" to go somewhere (funeral, family function, etc.) I begin to feel the urge to run. Now, school is different for me and always has been. Most of what I have learned has been helpful, but the rubber meets the road when it is put into practice. Unfortunately, I learned early that in order to get where I want to go, I need the degree. A wise man told me once not to let things or people control me. I think in a way, you are allowing the institutions to control you. Love you, MoM
hang in there my friend. It sucks that the things we most want to do are sometimes not easy. I love you and am praying for you in this.
Julie, surely if I can do it then YOU can do it! :)
I love you friend!
sweetness. lets talk soon. are you still studying? i love you.
Julie-
I was thinking about you this morning on my way to work. Keep pushing through the school it will be a challenge at times, but the end it is extremely rewarding.
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